Sex occupies an important place in every healthy marriage or relationship therefore enjoying it reinforces couple’s bond. When having sex you do not only want to feel very good, but you also want your life partner to feel good as well. When shared, the pleasure is even better! Everybody in a relationship when having sex wants to have fun, right? Otherwise, they do not have intimacy. Sex is definitely what you and your husband or wife makes it.
Actually, depending on your body, you have things that turn you on, and other things that don’t turn you on; in fact you do not even care for them in bed during sex. For sure every woman has breasts, a vagina and a clitoris; likewise, every man has a penis and a pair of testicles (I am not mentioning here people who for health reasons, or congenital defects are not shape that way) but not two women or men enjoy sex the same way.
For instance, my specific sexual desire triggers, are not identical to yours. When in bed with your other half, you do want him or her to know what arouses you so that your sexual life gets better life, right? But, why if you want something in particular, in bed and you do not dare asking it to your wife or your husband? He or she is the one who can make you sweet, if you do not ask him or her to please you that certain way, who is going to do it for you? Will your sex life be fulfilling?
One day as my sister Erin was talking to me, she happened to mention that one of our friends in common, Mary, brought up suspicions of her other half infidelities. Thereafter, Mary stated she could not get why her husband had to go out of the marriage bonds to enjoy sex while she, his legal wife, was at home and had only one desire: to please him.
Continuing the conversation with my sibling, she added that one day,on purpose, she shifted the conversation towards intimacy, and while addressing the topic she came to talk about sex mentioning that she did not know why guys have to go out with either prostitutes or lovers to enjoy some stuff during intimacy. In the same context, she added that she for instance would do a lot of stuff to please her man: him.
Quickly Mary’s husband chimed in like that: you know honey when it comes to his wife, there are stuff that a man is rather not at ease to talk about with regard to sex, not to say , things that a guy is sort of ashamed of elaborating about. Mary jumped in the conversation saying if a husband did not open up, some of his desires might not be satisfied.
As an example, her husband mentioned some type of sex; Mary said for instance that was something that she was willing to do for him because he was her husband and she was his wife. Her husband could not believed that, as he never thought that his wife would be willing to give that type of sexual pleasure.
This is not the only case that comes to my minds, for me to relate to you guys. Let us talk about another similar case.
In this current case those two persons, Paul and Harper, were not married but they lived in common law relationship. The guy, Paul, wanted his woman to please him in a certain way, but he never dare asking her as in his mind she was not the type of woman to do that type of sexual enjoyment.
What did he want her to do to please him? In fact, what he wanted was when they were together in bed for her to please herself and for him just to watch her. I am not talking that for her to have sex with someone else than her husband for him to watch them. No, I know you guys it was not about that! I am not talking either about her to please herself with any sex toy like some dildos, or any other toys, just for her to use her imagination, and for him also to give sometimes some directions but not often.
Sometimes wives do not want to say what their secret desire is out of fear that their husbands think that they are not good women. I have heard that many times. No, for that reason they cannot say it to their husbands, they apprehend the judgement, the criticism. What type of women they will think they are if they do some special stuff in bed, or ask to be please in a certain way? Most of the time those sexual enjoyments are not things that the guys is not used or using to doing, no he did it in the past or continue to do it with other women(depending of the dynamic of their relationship) but she anyways will not say a word about it.
I even heard that they will only do things that they already know that are allowed by the husband, things they know he likes and that are approved in bed because they are afraid of asking some for some specific types of enjoyments, he would think that he has that with another man.
In such type of relationship, where there is a lack of sexual communication, how can the two spouses enjoy intimacy completely? How can they even keep wanting each other? One partner apparently is satisfied sexually speaking while the other wish have so many more things in bed; there are so many more things in his or her minds that they could enjoy, but as he/her does not dare saying it, that stays only in the minds , and does not get materialized.
I am not encouraging infidelity, you know me guys I will never do something like that; I am just speaking the truth. In fact, unfortunately, not enough communication about intimacy sometimes open the doors to infidelity. Not all man or woman will not be tempted to try to have some sexual enjoyments outside marriage.
Guys if you do not dare open up to your husband, or wife, do not you think that although it is possible for him or her to guess it, your desire will stay in your minds!
