Yes you are married or in a committed relationship, but you just met that person, or you already know / him or her and realize that you are feeling something for him/her. We are all human, therefore temptations come in various forms and shapes, so it is up to us to know if you let yourselves drive by your feelings or no.
That situation may even come as a surprise to you as you know that you love your husband/wife and you never had a doubt about it; in the past, it has never occurred that you to get infatuated with someone while you were in any relationship. Having interest in someone other than your other half does not mean that you have stopped loving him/her, or you don’t feel feel anything anymore for him/ her.
My cousin Lynn in visit to my place, told me how she happened to have a crush on someone she met.
One day while accompanying her daughter Grace to the school bus, she met the bus driver, who had a talk with her. She learnt that he would only drove buses for a short term as he was about to finish a degree in the engineering field. That day she found herself thinking about that driver. The following day while on her way to drop Grace to the school bus, she thought again thinking about the bus driver; on seeing him she had a big smile and began chatting a bit with him.
According Lynn, the driver was not only handsome, but he was also very charming; in addition, he was her type of men. After the weekend has gone she saw him another time when putting Grace in the bus, but that time she noticed something very important; it seems that the driver was also interested in her; that was troubling. That night before sleeping her last thought was about him. The following day, they chatted and before heading to the school he asked for her phone number and her email.
Getting back home, she thought very well about all that. It is up to her to make that platonic situation turn into a love affair as it was obvious they both were into each other. For a moment she thought about having something with him, even just for a short while so that her husband would not know about i;t as this latter is extremely jealous and would fill for a divorce right away, and asked for the custody of his daughters.
after mature consideration, she wondered if she had to let her feelings drive her or listen the voice of reason. In case they had an affair, she would feel good and got a good deal of attention, but does that worth putting her marriage at risk, and maybe for her not to have the full custody of her two amazing daughters if her husband happened to know about her infidelity.
The next time when meeting him again she was pretty dry with him, as that way she let him know that she was not interested in having anything with him. This was how everything ended before it even really began.
Getting infatuated with another person than your current partner has nothing concrete yet even though in your minds something was already born, since love feelings are already there. That does not mean that you are unfaithful, as you do not really had any real talk about with the person in question to confess your feelings for him/her, you are in frequent contacts with him/her either. Furthermore, you have not already kissed, nor being sexually intimate. No. Being married or being in a committed relationship does not spare anybody from experiencing something like this. No it is depends on you to let it grow, and make it being an extramarital affair, or just cut it off from the beginning.
Do you really want to take the risk to start an extramarital relationship? Do you want to accept the risk to end your relationship for what you feel?. Do you want to throw away all your memories, and everything both of you have built together? Although you do not know it yet but this could be the end of everything if you persist in that path.
You also should know that many couples do not got together again after a separation or after a divorce.
Your relationship with your other half may not come to an end, but it may not be like before as complicity, trust, spontaneity are not anymore. How will you react if the two of you cannot be the way you guys were before he /she knows about the infidelity.
One advice I will give is to weight the pro and the cons and not do things that you are sure to regret in the future.
Personally, if hubby tells me that he feels something for someone else, I confess that will make me have a bad day, do not even ask if he really gets an affair with that individual. I am not the type of woman who easily share my man, I will not digest that very much. I will ask a lot of questions, and I will wonder how do things get to that point? What did I do that let that happen, and the like? Of course, with the passing of time, things get different as the honey moon period has gone since a long time, but for him to start seeing other women on a different angle, the love angle, maybe after all concerning.
Actually when your significant other is attracted to someone else, it can just be a one time, harmless and temporary thing, therefore no worries; however, other times it is just a red flag that something is not right between your husband and you or your wife and you. Find out what the matter is about then work on it to make your marriage work. Remember that marriages have ups and downs, and the way you handle them can do make the difference.
Guys, it can happen that you have a crush on someone who is not your significant other, this is out of your control, however what you have control on is whether you want that to turn into reality. Think twice!
