No matter how much you love your sweetheart and he or she love you as well, sooner or later you guys will have your first arguments. Oh well nobody is exempt of them. So you would better expect them and manage them well.
Fights, disagreements come in all shapes and sizes, they may even originate from things that may be so trivial but also they arise from serious matters. Having the right tools in hand to address the situation will be very beneficial for you and for your partner as well.
One of my friend had a huge argument with his husband only on suspicion that some friends were not only abusing him financially but also they were introducing girls to him so that he can have an affair with them. As it was their first big argument after they got married, Lynn did not know well how her husband would react. In her eyes as a young couple, they have to save money to achieve their shared goals that were not only having their own house, building an hotel and a opening a restaurant but also for their kids, the baby girl they had at that time and those they planned to have in the future, not to suffer because of lack of money.
It is good to save money and not wasting it in futilities, so in that sense the argument came from a valid point; however that day the conflict was so harsh that Mitchell said that he was going to file for divorce. Hearing that, Lynn had an enormous shock as she did not got married to get divorced. not that soon, not ever; that facet of her man’s personality was not known yet and turned out to even be very scary for her. Mitchell was what you call a genuinely nice guy always surrounded with friends, cracking jokes and laughing almost every time you meet him therefore reacting this way was totally unexpected.
Deeply troubled by her husband’s reaction, Lynn even remembered her daughters’ bottles that were sterilizing on the stove. It was till she heard a big noise coming from the kitchen that she realized that they were still there that she totally forgot to keep an eye on them, as a consequence many of them got burnt.
In spite of being angry at her husband, from that day, Lynn changes her tactics so that to protect her relationship and also to take care of the situation in a way productive manner.
Guys, arguments can also help you grow together with your partner and also as an individual, by this I mean that you learn about what can make your sweetheart mad, sad, unhappy, enraged, and even telling you some offensives words(I usually do not do that, but others do it) that later he or she will regret just because they are products of the fire of the moments. Yes, fighting is another way of letting your other half know that something upsets you, yes it is may be used to vent frustrations, anger and also at the same time to communicate needs; for instance, what your partner will like, or he/she want to have, what changes are needed or would be good to occur.
It is good to know your partner’s emotions, feelings, and triggers because imagine you do not know about them, and he or she may be unhappy and not directly verbalize it which in the long run may lead him or her to be rude to you and even resent you. But knowing them is the way that can lead you to take constructive actions at the right time. In addition,resentment, lack of care, being disrespectful, in a relationship or in a marriage, are things to avoid like plague as they have the power to ruin your marriage.
Although it may sound weird, arguing can indeed be healthy; As a matter of fact, when it is done with respect, and with the intent of sincerely communicate your needs, what bothers you in a positive way, without being overly defensive, and or showering your partners with criticisms such as you ungrateful, you are a very bad person, you do not care for me, conflicts contribute to lead your relationship in the right path and can in the future lead to less frequent issues in the family.
That makes you know him/her better, because if you have seen someone in good times only and never in his or her bad moments how can you say that you really know that person? Hmm, tell me! Take those arguments, those disputes and turn them into a moment where you seat and really listen to your other half, do not let your ego get in between since it is not only you in this but both of you guys; your goal it is not to win at all costs; think about the future of your relationship, and together work to find a solution to the problems. Because by listening to your partner’s concerns you not only show respect to him or her, you also care about his or her feelings, his/her emotions. And overall you care about your marriage.
If you find that arguments happen a bit in your relationships, do not worry too much as that does not automatically mean that the relationship is doomed. In fact, marital conflicts can also help you guys grow together; however by saying that I am not encouraging you to initiate arguments every single days with your spouse. Do not abuse it either!
