When coming back home in the evening, or late in the afternoon after work, we usually feel very tired and hungry as well, right? I think that nearly all readers of this post will concur.
Oh well cooking, mainly after a workday may not be as enjoyable especially when we had a rough day, trouble negotiating a contract, or we had managed conflicts with coworkers, and so on.
Not only my significant other and I are tired physically, but we are also mentally drained therefore preparing dinner together with your partner can be truly beneficial. This is the reason why I strongly encourage married and unmarried couples to make it part of their evening or early night routine instead of doing it on their own.
I myself incorporate it in my family life. I have to confess that there are many benefits to do so, and it makes my life easier. Hubby and I cook together whenever possible. He even calls it teamwork.
When cooking together nobody can complain that it falls on him or her all the time, putting on unhappy face, grumbling, mumbling and putting blame on his or her partner. I am used to witnessing that. In fact, I have to confess that I even put blame on my other half in the past, and so more than once.
Oh yes I complained, and I was not going to hide it from you guys. I am honest. At that time, I felt overwhelmed. In such moments if you happened to be at my place, you would hear this: it is me all the time who has to cook dinner, why me? why cannot you do it as well? That is not fair. Yes those judgmental claims came out of my very mouth. I lashed out.
Although I love cooking and preparing tasty and attractive dishes, after a rough day, my mind is not always into cooking; I think that I am not the only one to feel like this. Many people, mainly, after spending the day at work negotiating a contract, dealing with their boss, or a difficult client, or managing conflicts with coworkers; all that can make preparing dinner be considered as an hassle. Too many times preparing dinner is the last thing on their mind.
Despite of not always wanting to go into the kitchen, open the fridge, take off pots and saucepans, grab the knife along with the cutting board and the plastic big spoon, and turn on the oven to get dinner ready, we have to eat something. Of course, we are not going to starve either.
Indeed eating is important to gain strength to be healthy, and to be able to work and go on with life. You may say that it is simple, the solution is to order food or go eating in a restaurant when we are not in the cooking mood; I know.
Although that idea is attractive, not everybody can afford eating out all the time, or several times a week on a regular basis. Putting aside the money spent eating out could be used to take care of other things. Also, many restaurant food are full with MSG, lot of salt, unhealthy oil, lot of refined sugar and so on, which has been scientifically proven to be unhealthy. It is well know that excess amount of salt is incriminated in cardiovascular diseases like high blood pressure.
While it may be tempting and easy to fall in the trap of putting blame on each other when it comes to cooking, avoid doing it as it is not of any help; instead things usually get worse. This is not healthy for the relationship harmony.
My friend Deborah was so stressed and overwhelmed that she saw nighttime cooking as a unwelcome chore. On top of cooking dinner, she was the one who took care of the baby who wanted to be all the time in her arms, to soothe her whenever she cried, to feed her, to change her diapers and to get her ready for bed. To her, the solution was to order food, which took a toll on her finances as that was done for quite a while.
It is true that for some couples it is the duty of the woman to get dinner and other meals ready, this is their dynamic. It is a normal fact, and it works. There is a well know Youtuber who has six kids, who said that kitchen is her domain, and when having people over who offer to help she kindly decline it. It is crystal clear that not only she enjoys it but also she sees herself in that role.
However, for those who are not pro-kitchen like the aforementioned Youtuber mommy, my own mom and me there is a good chance that they get having enough of cooking after working.
What are the benefits of cooking together?
First off, dinner gets ready quicker than if it was done by only one person as we spend less time cooking which means we have more time afterwards to either spend alone, rest, or to do activities together.
Secondly, no blame is put on our significant other.
Thirdly, in case dinner is a bit salty or not as delicious as usual, we either share the responsibility, keep our mouth shut, or make jokes about it.
Quarterly, cooking brings us together which increases complicity. We have the opportunity to connect, to interact in lieu of staying alone in the kitchen and for your partner to be in the living room watching TV, or playing games online.
And finally, the household life is more unified, then more harmonious.
Whenever we feel overwhelmed by cooking after a hard day’s work, just ask for help because he or she may not even think of lending a hand if not requested.
Also, in some cultures the man expect his woman to be in the kitchen cooking after work or not, tired or not. Hence the need to have a good talk to change the situation, as every relationship is unique. It is not because our grandma, mom and aunts never complained about cooking all the time that our wives will not complain too. This can be totally different.
Even if we come from the same culture, where it is seen as normal to cook for the whole family, our partner may not share this opinion.
As a couple, it is our duty to keep our relationship going, by listening to your partner, and working through concerns and issues hand in hand. Our happiness definitely depend on both of us guys!
Remember to always bring up the request nicely when tackling the topic; please avoid the ” you do this, you don’t do that”, otherwise that might end up in arguments and disputes making the matter worse.
Help your partner prepare dinner after work , and enjoy your meal!
